|September 27, 2016||I Believe That She Will Win||no comments|
|September 21, 2016||A Place That Makes It Okay To Break The Rules And The Glass Ceiling||no comments|
|September 16, 2016||Wise Emotion||no comments|
|September 15, 2016||The People Of Forever Are Not Afraid||no comments|
|September 12, 2016||The Bechdel Test||no comments|
|September 07, 2016||As Above; So Below: The Five Element Theory||no comments|
|September 01, 2016||A September Challenge||no comments|
|August 30, 2016||Some More About Self-Esteem||no comments|
|August 25, 2016||Striking Back||no comments|
|August 22, 2016||Small Wins in Self- Esteem||0 comments|
FULL MOON/HARVEST MOON/ LUNAR ECLIPSE brings forth a surge of emotional energy. Read the entirety of Sarah Varca's blog here.
I don’t focus on that too much because I really don’t see that there is a solution. I was born during the first week of the first Intifada, so nothing has ever been quiet or normal for me. I don’t believe there will be a solution in my lifetime; I can’t even imagine how one would look. Shani Boianjiu
In “The People of Forever Are Not Afraid,” Shani Boianjiu gives us an insider’s look at the lives of ordinary 18-year-old female Israelis as they graduate from their small high school in a dusty development town on the northern border and join the Israeli Defense Forces. They are not the ideology-driven female soldiers of early Zionist lore but rather a more melancholy brand, going to serve because they must and hoping to make it through unscathed.
Boianjiu’s view is a open and uncensored opportunity to feel the dissonance between the fear-soaked tedium of compulsory military army life and the self-centered lens of girls transitioning to womanhood. Well done and besides what a great title for a book!
It goes like this: For a given work of fiction to pass the test, the work must 1) have at least two women in it, who 2) talk to each other, about 3) something other than a man.
The test is a basic measure of gender equality in a given film/show/book that to this day is ridiculously often not passed by Hollywood movies. The standard got its name from the cartoonist Alison Bechdel, who, in a 1985 strip from her comic Dykes to Watch Out For, introduced the idea as a winking criticism of male-dominated movies.
FiveThirtyEight did a study last year of 1,794 movies produced from 1970 to 2013 and found that just over half of them managed to pass the test. In 2015, 45% of this year’s biggest movies failed the Bechdel Test- which translates no improvement.
Ugh- our sexist culture is so pervasive- no wonder Hillary is so poorly treated. Maybe we need more than a Bechdel Test- maybe even an Equal Rights Amendment?
Somewhere between 476-221 BC, the five element Creation Cycle was introduced in China. Fire melts Metal. Metal chops down Wood. Wood grows through Earth. Earth makes the banks that the Water flows in. Water puts out Fire. These elements describe five different types of energy associated with a pair of organs and different kinds of emotions to be applied to the human body, to cycles of time, to mental aspects, and even colors.
Wood - sunrise - spring - upward - liver and gallbladder- anger, impatience, activity, positive attitude, enthusiasm. Sour. Food sources include Leafy green vegetables, raw or steamed, sauerkraut, vinegars and lemon.
Fire - midday - summer - outward - heart and small intestine - hysteria, excitement, expressive, outgoing, social. Bitter. Food sources include Fried onions, garlic, ginger, spring onions/scallions, mild spices, coffee, alcohol, oils, nuts, seeds and herbs such as parsley.
Earth - afternoon - late summer - downward - spleen, pancreas and stomach - jealousy, quality of life, practicality, stability, homely. Sweet. Food sources include Sweet root and ground vegetables cooked into a soup or casserole. Stewed fruits, apple juice, syrups.
Metal - evening - autumn - inward - lungs and colon -depression, playfulness, contentment, contained, inner strength. Pungent. Food sources include long cooked grains such as brown rice, wheat, rye, barley, oats or spelt. Pickles.
Water - night - winter - flowing in any direction - kidney and bladder - fear, objective, artistic, original, flexibility. Salty. Food sources include Miso soups, bean soups, stews or casseroles, mild use of sea salt.
The principles of the five elements are fundamental to acupuncture, feng shui, shiatsu, and qi gong. Practitioners use acupressure points and meridian diagnosis to detect imbalances in energy and correct these through stimulating or calming the chi flowing through the body.
With The 5 Element Qi Gong form that I have been studying, the 5 categories are applied to movements, which relate to certain groups of muscles, vessels, and joints. Begin with this questions: What elements were you born with or are represented in your name? Which do you tend to demonstrate in your usual thoughts and actions? How is the condition of your organs? What is missing?
Once you discover which elements are too weak or too strong, you can compensate by bringing in or diminishing elements that feed or restrict weakness or strength by wearing different colors, eating certain foods, or tapping particular meridians. With balanced and harmonious energy, you can flow easily, fully, and softly fostering harmony and balance in your life.
My daughter and I have agreed to a fitness challenge for the month of September. I’m not exactly sure where she got the idea: maybe from this website or this TED Talk by Google software engineer Matt Cutts. The idea is to stick with a new routine for an entire month with the outside goal that the regular lengthy commitment may end with a new well-established habit.
Our particular challenge is 10 minutes of aerobics, 10 minutes of strength training, 10 minutes of yoga or Qigong. The idea of committing to someone else is to be held accountable- so much so that you actually complete the challenge for the full 30 days.
This is not an exclusive club. Join us- 30 minutes of your choice of exercise daily for this month of September-Let’s meet back here at September 30th and see how we did.
I received this note about my blog entry last week:
August 22, 2016 at 10:27 am
Very helpful. The negative thoughts can occur instantaneously and even outside of our awareness. Important to slow down and notice even if in process of a behavior that is the outcome of the negative thought.
As a follow up to your post it would be helpful if you would write a blog about dealing with irrational self- beliefs and expectations ie. “I need to be perfect” “I need to be liked by everyone”?
Dear Reader, Thanks for taking this further. Underlying the core issue of low self-esteem is irrational thinking. Having personally experienced cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), I understand first-hand how we develop false concepts based upon our individual learning experiences, our parents' beliefs, and societal expectations. Challenge, fear, confusion, worry, criticism, grandiosity, all-or-nothing thinking, magical or delusional thinking, paranoia and leaps in logic bombard us to severely affect our individual belief system.
The first half of the battle comes in recognizing these irrational thinking styles and understanding how they developed. It’s not easy to identify and it is more than likely that you will need the help from someone on the outside to recognize your personal irrationality. But it’s worth the effort, because once you label and dissect an irrational thought, you begin to take away some of its power.
One of the fundamental tools in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) for the process of letting this false ideas go is a simple cognitive restructuring form called The Thought Record. It takes each irrational self-belief, reveals its source, its underlying principle, and its link to a negative emotion giving you an opening into new more positive possibilities. Try it. Again, from personal experience, I can assure you it works!
I heard a fascinating interview on the BBC with the deputy mayor of Nice, Christian Estrosi, about the resort town’s decision to ban the burkini, the full-body Islamic swimsuit. He explained that “hiding the face or wearing a full-body costume to go to the beach is not in keeping with our ideal of social relations” and was “founded on the subjugation and enslavement of women”.
The Nice ban refers specifically to July’s Bastille Day truck attack in the city that claimed 86 lives, and the murder 12 days later of a Catholic priest near the northern city of Rouen. The day after the Normandy church attack, wanting to react to issues of terrorism, security and the place of Islam in French society, the mayor of the French Riviera town of Cannes decided to ban burkinis from public beaches. Speaking in the name of public order and French secularism the ban criticized “ostentatious clothing which refers to an allegiance to terrorist movements which are at war with us”.
At the heart of the burkini row is the French principle of secularism, the strict separation of church and state to foster equality for all private beliefs. The state’s goal is to be neutral in terms of religion and allow everyone the freedom to practice their faith as long as there is no threat to public order.
On one hand it’s too bad the only way to fight terrorists is to expose the women. On the other maybe it’s a way to help liberate these women from their own oppression. What I can say is I was quite intrigued with the deputy major of Nice and interested to understand the thinking that seeks retaliation through liberation.
Do you know your inner critic? Does she doubt, judge, belittle you? Does she tell you that you are not good enough? Does she say negative hurtful things to you—things that you would never ever dream of saying to anyone else?
A critic might seem useful, but really when she is within you, she can inhibit and limit you in such ways that you are robbed of your piece of mind and emotional well-being. When your inner critic consistently labels you in a negative way, it has a demoralizing effect on the larger self-concept of who you are and what you can be and do.
You may ask,” but what if my critic is right?” It doesn’t matter. Negative self-talk is never in your interest. There is always a kinder, better way to treat yourself that doesn’t involve negative labels and self-destructive mindsets.
To silence your inner critic:
1. Notice her during every conscious moment. Don’t let the negative thinking be automatic. Making the conscious effort to slow down and pay more attention to your thoughts and your emotions. Negative emotions such as doubt, guilt, shame, and worthlessness are almost always signs of your critic at work.
2. Separate the critic from you. She is not part of your authentic self. You were not born with her. She is a voice you have internalized based on outside influences such as other people’s criticism, expectations, or standards. Name her and call her out when you hear her.
3. Remove her power by talking back to her. Tell her you don’t want to hear what she has to say and what you are choosing instead is to be kind to yourself. No matter what the inner critic has said, you do have positive traits that need to be acknowledged. Replace the critic with a stronger ally: an inner voice that acts as a friend. Start noticing and actively seek out the good things about yourself. Make a deliberate effort to say something positive whenever you hear your critic. Become your own best friend!